And Twenty-Two Degrees Felt Balmy…

This morning, when I took the boy to school, the temperature was eighteen degrees below (BELOW, PEOPLE!) zero!

This afternoon, when I picked the boy up from school, the temperature was twenty-two degrees above zero.

So what do you do when there’s a forty-degree temperature change during the day, and you haven’t been out of the house for the last three days, due to ALL THE BITTER COLD THAT SAPPED YOUR STRENGTH AND MADE YOU WEAK AND MADE YOU LOOK AT CONDOS ONLINE THAT WERE IN FIJI?

You get out of the house.  That’s what you do.

You get out.  You take your buddy Quinn.  And you skate like crazy.

Yes, there were some times when I sang “Another One Bites the Dust” out loud to myself!  In fact, I hummed that song a lot this afternoon.

Yes, there were some times of out-and-out ice wrestling, which is very similar to the Ice Capades, but a lot more violent.  And there aren’t any costumes involved.  Or twirling on the toes, either.

And then there were some times when I sang a few bars from an old Prince song to myself.  Except he’s no longer Prince, because he’s the Artist Formerly Known as Prince. I’m not sure WHAT he’s known as now.

“She walked in through the out door, out door!  She wore a raspberry beret; the kind you find in a second-hand store.”

Except there was no she, and no one was wearing a raspberry beret.  All they were doing was skating in through the out door.

There were wild games  of tag.  And wild games of Shadow Tag, which involved skating as fast as you could to the Dark Side of the Rink, and dropping to your knees, so that none of your shadow was visible on the ice.

We have three bruised knees to show for those sweet  maneuvers.

Eventually, we had to come inside and take our skates off, where the boy emphatically announced, “I wish I’d never outgrown my OWN skates!  These funky blue BORROWERS kill my feet.”

Secretly, I fell in love with the term borrowers, in reference to rented skates.

And yes, there were antics while we were leaving the borrowers behind and donning our snow boots, because really?  Can a ten-year-old boy do ANYTHING AT ALL without antics?

For those of you who don’t have ten-year-old boys, the answer is no.

No, they can’t.

Did everyone have a good time?


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