Do you know what I did today?
I painted our bedroom doors, because apparently someone never accomplished that after we moved into this house. Until today, that is, because Hubs was all of the notion, “If we can paint ONE door in this house, we can paint ALL the doors in this house.” And when Hubs says the words we can paint, he means that I can paint. I think it’s because he considers HIS job done on building our house, since all the 2″x4″s are in place and we have Sheetrock and flushing toilets and shingles and he even plugged in our refrigerator.
Because I had nothing better to do today, I pulled out the canvas drop cloth and the gallon jug of paint, and I put on my big girl attitude, and I got the job done. I only painted two doors, though, because painting is a marathon, people; it isn’t a sprint. Plus, if I painted all the doors today, I wouldn’t have any horrible chores that make me grumpy to do NEXT WEEK.
And then I painted a sign, because listen. Apparently I think Martha Stewart and her crew of hired hands lives here or something.
And then I scrubbed down two bathrooms.
And then I did three loads of laundry.
And then I picked a sick boy up early from school, because he uttered the words I AM GOING TO PUKE within earshot of his teacher, and she sent him straight home to remove the threat of contagions from the classroom.
I put the boy to bed. And I got the boy a book to read, even though he thought he felt okay to… you know… just crawl onto the sofa and be motionless there in front of the television for a bit. Or maybe six bits, if that’s how many bits are in an hour-long episode of Hunting Big Foot. I gave the boy the stink eye and simply said, “Read!” Axl Heck, from The Middle, had nothing on the boy today, because the boy demonstrated his VERY BEST imitation of Axl throwing his head back and sighing at his incompetent parents.
So the sick boy read.
Or rather, he looked at the pages in his book for a while, making me THINK that he was reading, because moving his eyes along the page to see the words all lined up in sentence formation made him dizzy. And also hungry.
So I gave him a snack. And he didn’t throw it up.
And then I cleaned a closet.
And then I scrubbed down a kitchen.
And then I texted Hubs and said, “Listen. Do I have to add DINNER to my list of chores today, too?”
Apparently I did not, because Hubs brought home sandwiches from Jimmy John’s, and I fell in love with him all over again. When the sandwiches showed up, I wanted to stand on the table and belt out the words to “Wind Beneath My Wings,” because y’all! Hubs understands me.
And that, people, is often how a Monday shakes down around this place. It’s all work and great sandwiches and a whole lot of BORING. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s boring post, entitled HOW TO USE A TOOTHBRUSH TO SCRUB THE GROUT IN YOUR BATHROOM TILE. It promises to be riveting.