I’m Playin’ The Baby Card On Y’all Tonight

A couple of weeks ago, my friend, Evelyn, and I were talking, and she said, “You know, you can play that Baby Card now and get out of some stuff.”

I asked her, “Like what kind of stuff?”

Because folding laundry?  Well, that sounds like something I would seriously enjoy getting out of.  And also cooking dinner.

Evelyn said, “When they need cupcakes for a fundraising bake sale, you can just sigh and say, ‘I would love to help, but I can’t; I have a baby.'”

And then we invented others.

“What?  You need someone to drive carpool this week, and pick up all SIX kids?  Oh, I’d love to help out.  It’s just that I can’t.  I have a baby.”

“You need someone to teach Sunday School this week?  Oh, that’s such a worthwhile ministry, and I would absolutely love to help, but I can’t.  I have a baby.”

Naturally, I have been using this on Hubs frequently.

“What?  You want me to mow the back section of the yard?  Well, normally I would, you know.  I’m all about the entire family pitching in, but I can’t.  I have a baby.”

“I really would have loved to have gotten all the laundry done today, but you’ll just have to wear dirty jeans to the office tomorrow.  I have a baby.”

And then not long ago, Hubs was holding Thing 2 in the living room, and I asked if he would maybe come help me quickly load the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen.  He sighed and replied, “Honey, normally I would love to.  I wouldn’t mind helping at all.  But I can’t tonight.  I have a baby.”

And then there was the boy.  The boy has a VERY! STRONG! AVERSION! to singing in front of crowds.  The aversion is such that the boy pretty much just doesn’t participate in anything that involves him praising something with song.  It’s why he threw the TRY OUT FOR CHOIR THIS YEAR flyer away before he even walked out the front doors of the school.  He said he didn’t want me to see it and make him join.  It’s why he wouldn’t do the Christmas program at church this year; he had heard through the grapevine that there was some “choir time” involved.

For the past few months, his Sunday School class has been practicing songs to sing for the congregation, and last Sunday was the day.  I had no idea.  As in, I learned that the Sunday School would be singing moments before they actually took the stage.  The boy had failed to remind me, thinking that if I didn’t know, he wouldn’t have to do it.  And then, during church but well before the singing began, the boy grabbed Thing 2 and cuddled him close.  He rocked Thing 2 to sleep, in fact.

And when the pastor made the call for all the Sunday School kids to move forward and take the stage for some songs, the boy looked at me and whispered, “You know I’d love to go up there and sing, but I can’t.  I have a baby.”

And tonight?

Well, I’d love to write a decent blog post that is both witty and sentimental, but I can’t.

I have a baby.

And that baby is a full ninety minutes ahead of me in sleeping tonight, which means I have to head to bed and catch up.

Happy Wednesday night, y’all.

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