I almost didn’t show up here tonight, but then I remembered that I’ve never really been one to play hookey. I was also never tardy to class, and I did my homework.
I thought that there might be a giant, gold trophy somewhere in adulthood for NEVER TARDY! HOMEWORK DONE ON TIME!, but it never happened. Apparently, potential employers don’t really ask the question, “Were you ever late to biology?”
But if they did… I could answer with all honesty, “No, sir.”
Where was I?
Yes… I almost skipped out on a blog post again tonight, but that would have been two nights in a row, and the guilt was eating me up. So I’ve just popped in to say hello, and to say FLU! FLU! I HAD THE FLU THIS WEEKEND! I had the fever and the body aches and the stomach ache and the I’M FREEZING moments, followed by the I’M ROASTING AND VERY POSSIBLY ON FIRE moments.
I’m afraid that I was rather high maintenance.
And then, along with the flu, was the dreaded LIST. Normally, I’m a list-lover, but this weekend I just laid in bed, suffering and shivering from 101.2, and mentally going over I NEED A GIFT FOR THIS PERSON YET, and DO I REALLY HAVE TO BAKE HOLIDAY COOKIES?, and WHAT KIND OF CONTENT CAN I EVEN PUT INTO A CHRISTMAS LETTER TO GO WITH OUR CARD?, and SHOULD I BUY PRE-MADE CINNAMON ROLLS SOMEWHERE FOR THE NEIGHBORS’ CHRISTMAS GIFTS?, and WHAT, BESIDES MORE TRACTORS, CAN I BUY FOR THING 2 THIS YEAR?, and COULD I GET AWAY WITH NOT WRITING A CHRISTMAS LETTER? COULD I JUST SEND THE CARD OUT?, and WHEN CAN I THROW BACK ANOTHER SHOT OF THE NYQUIL?, and IF THE INVENTOR OF FLANNEL SHEETS WAS STANDING RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW, I WOULD PUNCH HIM SQUARE IN THE NOSE, BECAUSE THESE ARE THE HOTTEST SHEETS I’VE EVER SUFFERED IN.
So I’ll just leave you with this tonight:
With any luck at all, I’ll be right back here tomorrow evening, with a real blog post. With even greater luck, it’ll have real sentences that don’t qualify as RUN-ON OF THE YEAR.
Y’all have a merry Monday, and remember to take your Vitamin C. ‘Tis the season for it.