I Now Know Nineteen Synonyms For “Bacteria”

This has been one of those weeks.

And by one of those weeks, I mean SCIENCE FAIR.

Not that the science fair has actually taken place, because that’s tomorrow night, when the boy will be interviewed about his project and explain both cold fusion and string theory to the judges.  What we have been doing this week is all the PROJECT STUFF.

The boy is working on a microbiology project, which is due tomorrow, in all its THREE-PANELED-BOARD-SCIENCE-FAIR GLORY, and he lost me at MICROBIOLOGY.  But I understood the part where he said, “Mom, I’m culturing raw hamburger that has been left at room temperature for thirty hours, and I’m determining whether garlic will help inhibit the growth of bacteria.”

All I can guess is that the lab is smelling rather pleasant right now, and I want to kiss the founding fathers of the science fair laws, who stated that microbiology projects COULD NOT BE DONE AT HOME, because they MUST BE DONE IN A REAL LAB SETTING.  I should probably offer the lab a new Scentsy pot and a bottle of wine to apologize for MY SON LEFT HAMBURGER ON YOUR LAB COUNTER ALL WEEK.

Last night and tonight, we have been working on, “Mom, you sit at the computer and JUST TYPE, while I dictate to you, and I’m going to be using some microbiology terms.”  Spellchecker has never been a better friend to me than it has in the past two evenings.

So that’s what I am now, people.  I’m a technical typists, and I’m typing big words that are just really fancy ways of saying, “There’s a blue fur coat on the meat.”  It’s also the reason why this blog post is being cut off rather early tonight.

But, before I go, I have to tell you that our cute neighbor boy, age fourteen, is a tried and true Seattle Seahawks fan.  I don’t know WHY he picked the team, but all the Picking of His Favorite happened a long time ago, and the cute neighbor boy has adorned himself in all things blue and green for years now.

And THAT, people, has led to some friendly, neighborly ribbing, because Hubs is the Denver Broncos’ number one fan, even though he’s never gone so far as to attend a live game, half-naked and covered with just a whiskey barrel and a beard.

THIS has made Hubs so happy this week:

68367_10152170658046645_386990447_nWe laughed like hyenas in a drunk tank and posted that snapshot to the cute neighbor boy’s Facebook page, because we’re incredibly mature.

It was just a happy little break from typing scientific terms that the boy has to spell out loud to me, while I say, “Isn’t there an ENGLISH WORD for that?”

Y’all have a great Wednesday evening.

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