Our first week of summer vacation is going along nicely.
By nicely, I mean that Thing 2 keeps getting up at 4:45 in the morning, because he’s completely focused on staying committed to his goal of wearing the big people down so that he can assume the throne. And then yesterday, he came up to me and said, “Oh, no! WHAT happened?” When Thing 2 asks this… it is never. ever. good. Usually it means that the door is now missing from his bedroom, or he has just flushed the toilet and his blanket didn’t go down the pipes like he thought it might, and he DID try to sop up the flood with an entire roll of Charmin.
In response to this question yesterday, I pretty much hollered, “WHAT DID YOU DO?” That’s when Thing 2 reached down the back of his pants and pulled a handful of poo up to show me.
Bless. His. Heart.
And then the boy and his buddy, Quinn, decided to go golfing this afternoon. I loaded up their clubs and drove them to the golf course. I handed the boy a ten-dollar bill so they could buy a bucket of balls to smack at the driving range, and then I said, “I expect some change back.”
(That’s because I have learned, with a teenager, if you DO NOT add that phrase about wanting to see money come back to you, it will, in fact, NOT come back to you.)
Thirty-six minutes after I had dropped the boys off at the golf course, my phone rang. The boy and Quinn announced that they were in the middle of the perfect storm, with wind and rain, and rain and wind and also lightning, but don’t worry, because they were inside the clubhouse and very safe, and they had spent my money on Polish dogs and fries, and did I want to come pick them up, because how could they golf, when they had to employ extra geometry to determine the angle their golf balls would take in the high winds?
And then the boy played the Trump Card, which is, “And, Mom… I know you don’t like me outside with golf clubs when there’s lightning.”
Yes, turn-around trips to the golf course are so much fun, when you have to factor in the car seat and the toddler. Our car seat is not user friendly. It requires a PhD in Straps and Harness Management, which is why I just sent Mam out to collect the boys before they were hit by lightning bolts.
Not part of the ten dollar bill came back to me, but MAN ALIVE! THE POLISH DOGS WERE DELICIOUS!
Of course, we have had some fun this week, too.
Mama’s laundry pile is significantly smaller, and I count that as FUN.
And then I gave that toddler of ours some snack crackers this afternoon. If we had to do a Word Association with these snapshots, I would yell out the word, “Piranha,” because TEETH, ANYONE?!