I THINK that I’m catching The Plague. I can’t be certain, because I’m not a doctor. (It’s because becoming an MD was going to take a lot of years in college, and there were a lot of words I couldn’t pronounce in all the textbooks, and I would NEVER have been able to examine someone’s open, pus-oozing sores in order to prescribe antibiotics. Majoring in something easy… like LET’S TEACH TWENTY THIRD-GRADERS HOW TO KICK A BALL… seemed more logical. I can handle the occasional bloody nose when a kicked ball goes astray, but open sores on someone else will lay me flat out in a GONE WITH THE WIND faint, every single time.)
I suspect The Plague.
I’m still sitting on the fence at the moment. It’s not that I actually feel POORLY right now, but I feel tired and also not quite right. And my chest feels scratchy, and the thought of a hot cup of chicken noodle soup and my pajama pants is very much at the forefront of my mind.
I also just did the Big Haul at Walmart with the toddler strapped in the cart. We had us some adventures, let me tell you. Primarily, I’m thinking of the time that a couple next to us was buying cans of black beans. The woman pulled the cans off the shelf, and then the husband took them and pitched those cans into their cart.
That’s when Thing 2 SCREAMED — screamed like a little girl with his pants on fire — “OH, NO!!!! HE TOOK THAT AWAY FROM HER!!! GIVE IT BACK!!! GIVE IT BACK!!!!”
The toddler is two-and-a-half, and he’s already an accomplished tattletale.
I have also hauled everything that we bought at Walmart… all 927 bags… inside our house and unpacked them, which could very well be EVEN WORSE than the actual BUYING of the stuff.
And then I slaved over a hot oven and made frozen pizza rolls for my family’s dinner, because listen. I have a rule. And the rule is very simple: If I have just been inside of Walmart for the Big Haul, in which the entire cart was heaped to the brim, and it is less than an hour before dinnertime should happen… I will not be doing any labor-intensive meal. The end.
So pizza rolls it was.
I wish that I had more for y’all tonight. I wish that I had some inspirational story or uplifting message, but the truth is… I just don’t tonight, because I need to lie down and try to determine whether or not I’m really sick. I’m hoping that the answer turns out to be a solid NO, but my friend, Carrie… who suffered through nearly ten days with a virus last week… told me today, “Clear your calendar. This virus is a big one and will require you to be on the sofa for DAYS. It was awful!”
We’ve always called her Debbie Downer.
Y’all have a happy Tuesday.